In true Gilmore Girls spirit, I’ve been channeling my inner Rory and am currently working through my 27th book of the year (hashtag, Goodreads Reading Challenge). I’m doubly Gilmore-y right now, though, because my current read is Lauren Graham’s Talking as Fast as I Can: From Gilmore Girls to Gilmore Girls, and Everything in Between. In her part musings, part memoir that actually does read like a too-fast conversation with Lorelai, Graham shares bits of everything from turning a Gershwin song “about playing an instrument into a song about abusing a fish” (p.31), to—in compliance with one of my personal preferences—always shooting her scene with actual coffee in her prop coffee cup.
Here’s a fun bit from Graham’s essay entitled, “You Can’t Be Vegan Just for Ellen.” Caution: It’ll throw you into literal Gilmore Girls withdrawals even if you’re in good health and it’s not raining outside.
Top-Secret Hollywood Secrets
“1. If you’re trying to lose weight, you’re going to be hungry most of the day, fairly cranky, and irritating to your friends—or maybe it’s your friends who are irritating; it’s hard to tell because you’re so hungry—and you need to be like this every day for about two weeks to see results.
“2. I lost the most weight once right after a bad breakup, and then again while rehearsing a Broadway show. Try to arrange for these things to happen at the same time and then you’ll really be looking good!
“3. Most successful diets involve eating very clean, healthy foods in small quantities, with very few carbohydrates, almost no sugar, very little alcohol, and a ton of physical activity. This combination appears in almost every diet book out there. You can combine foods, count points, or act like you are French, Greek, Spanish, or Beyoncé. While each diet varies slightly, I’ve read every single one of them and I can assure you they all have the above in common.
“4. Bell-bottoms will go in and out of style every few years for the rest of your life. This is a bit off topic, but just another thing I keep meaning to tell you. They’ll change them just enough to make you think you need new ones. You do not. Keep the ones you already have.”
(p. 53) “Plus, I think it should be against the law to feel down on yourself regarding any issues that Oprah is still working on, and OPRAH IS STILL WORKING ON THIS ISSUE [the best diet]. She has rubbed elbows with heads of state and every celebrity in the universe, opened a school in Africa among other accomplishments, made millions of dollars, and helped scores of people live a better life, but, by her own admission, she is still working on diet-related topics. So to sum up: let’s all chillax about it and spend more time being kind to ourselves and doing truly useful things like trying to resuscitate words that were never cool, like chillax.
“Good news! My accountant has just informed me that by imparting all these Top-Secret Hollywood Secrets to you, I’ve now saved you at least one zillion American dollars! Just make sure to mention me when you talk about it on the Today show (Hi, Kathie Lee and Hoda!).”
Graham, Lauren. Talking as Fast as I Can (p. 51, 53). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.
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Waverly At Dawn 