Your shine compares to Perseus above
My head, and while I ponder everything
You make appear minute, I can’t but love
The small existence of my lone being.
This myriad of scattered thought’s so quick
To coarse through knots of synapse, just to leave
Me stumped once more, irrelevant as tick
Of yesterday… His games… They come to tease
My solo essence. Why do I yet cling
To anxious frailty? You, sweet sky, are still.
I fret. Among my trouble, where this peace
Abounds with patience, come alter my will.
May all that binds me tight, rope taught and strained,
Be as a harmony, be as the rain.
No, no, it’s not a “Spiderman” post. That phrase is just the first thing that came crossed my slightly nerdy mind.
Lately, my battles have been fought making sure all my bases were covered in case of staggering losses. It’s who I am, how I was raised: pay your bills, save a chunk, then be happy with what’s left. Nothing wrong with that – unless it stresses you so much that you can’t actually be happy with what you’ve got left.
I’m completely spoiled by living on my own. There’s just me.
The challenges come when I find myself anxious to do something extraordinary. Sometimes it’s buying an overpriced concert ticket, then spending all the gas and half the day driving to the grounds, then splurging on garlic fries and t-shirts. Sometimes it’s buying the latest iPhone, or treating myself with a new instrument, or flying to Texas for an outrageous music festival, or picking up the latest Fossil watch. And I’m guilty! A lot of this is material.
Moving across the country? That’s an experience, so many new places, new people, new music, new food! This has been the source of my anxiety. While I find myself too careful, clingy to my community, attached to family, comfortable in what I’ve made for myself these two years in California, Jean-Paul Sartre couldn’t have said it better.
Each day, we are given new life, in order that we might live abundantly. We are given too many good things to enjoy. I personally believe that an abundant life is valuable enough to risk it, “once in a while”.